Alberto’s

Don’t eat here. This ought to be your friendly, neighborhood late-night pizza shop — in fact, it was your friendly, neighborhood late-night pizza shop, until the owner decided to buy a Hummer and routinely park it in the bus zone outside the restaurant. It’s hard to think of a less neighborly thing to do than to bring this Maryland-licensed monstrosity into town and leave it in an illegal parking space.

It takes about 45 seconds to call 311 and have the guy ticketed; I recommend doing that on your way across the street to Pizzeria Paradiso, who are excellent neighbors and have very good pizza as well.